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These Birds Are Out Of Control

Birds poop on John and steal sandwiches out of his hand while he's eating them.

Birds poop on John and steal sandwiches out of his hand while he’s eating them.

While this is happening, I’m eating my sandwich. We make our own little sandwiches and bring them to the beach. I’m eating my sandwich, and a bird comes from behind me, in the air, and takes a bite of my sandwich that is in my hand, that I am in the process of eating. He didn’t get the sandwich because I grabbed it as they went away, but he took a bite out of it. And of course now I have to throw out that whole sandwich because it’s got bird bite on it, alright? I don’t want the bird slobber. It’s in my hand, right?

That happened to I think one other person so the new move was while we’re eating lunch, hold your food close to your chest and be aware that the nearest bird may be behind you. We’re watching in front of us, we’re watching all these birds, watching them or whatever, I thought I was covered.

And there was an umbrella too, the thing flew like under the umbrella, over my shoulder, over the back of the seat, and you know, while still flying went aah-chomp! and tried to grab the sandwich out of my hand.

These birds are out of control. I don’t know what has gotten into them. They’re not afraid anymore, and they’re poopin’ on us, and they’re stealing our food out of our hands while we eat it.